For Mums: Golden Guidelines for Raising Excellent Kids: "Young People Can Think, Too."

 

I used to be a stubborn child. My grandmother would place me in a penalty room where I would have a timeout for a few days after she had tried everything to correct me and punish me for my numerous misdeeds but had not seen any improvement in me. Not that she would put me on a hunger strike; it was only that some perks would not be granted and my freedom to move around and behave as I pleased would be curtailed.

Grandma did occasionally enter the room to ask if I liked being locked up and then left again.

I would have no regrets at first when she put me in the penalty room, aside from playing rougher and completely turning the penalty room upside down. Then, eventually, when the loneliness set in, I would start to sober up.

While the timeout was in effect, at times, Grandma would ask them to bring me out of the room and into her bedroom. She would then cling to me and call me by her favourite name, "Ranti," and ask whether I liked being in the punishment room, being associated with misbehaviour, and how long I wanted to carry on misbehaving. Then, she would plead with me to "think" about it. And this is where I'm going with this post. When she told me to "think," did I truly think? Yes, even though I was a young kid, I gave my misdeeds a deep thought: "Young People Can Think, Too," and they would change for the better if you would just deal with them and address their wrongdoings in a more organic rather than mechanical and assertive rather than violent and aggressive manners.

Takeaway: (1). Point out your children's wrongdoings to them. (2). Give them plenty of warning. (3). Help them understand the damage their actions are causing to themselves and the benefits they could experience if they make a behaviour change. (4). Give them room to think independently and make choices so they are accountable for their consequences.

Get a copy of my book, For Mums: Golden Guidelines for Raising Excellent Kids. For more information on how to order a copy today, WhatsApp 08170768650.

 

To your happier parenting! 💚

 

Damilola Ogunremi,

Etiquette and Image Consultant

Author of For Mums: Golden Guidelines for Raising Excellent Kids